over the past few years, i am really beginning to understand what it means to be a good friend, and what to expect from the friends i have. lately, i've been disappointed in my friends. it's not just forgetting birthdays and not getting together on holidays, its the fact i put time and effort into maintaining friendships, where it seems i am the only one putting forth that effort. i understand people are busy; we all are. but while most of us have a few commitments, none of us have huge major ones different than the others. the simple fact is, i am sick of putting out more than i get back, and end up hurt in the process. if we can't get it together now, when are we going to? probably never. so why am i wasting time and effort finding the perfect bday gift and card, when they can't pick up the phone to say hello? why?
the solution? I don't know yet. But, I'm going to work on it.